And with that, Monday had me turn a fairly decent milestone of an age. There’s something special about having a birthday divisible by 10, and only slightly less champagne-poppingly good about having one divisible by five. So that was this one. Not only divisible by five, but also by nine. That’s right. I’m 90. Hard to believe that in the middle of the Roaring ‘20s, with William Lyon Mackenzie King in office, Canadian comedic icon Don Harron born a mere 10 days previous, and to the tune of “Rhapsody in Blue” I would pop my head outside and signal six more weeks of fall. So a few thoughts.
A couple of things struck me about this particular personal holiday. Firstly, there were very few cards. Four in total, in fact. The majority of them were sent by my relatives, each with a different and carefully crafted fart joke. The VA’s are nothing if we are not classy. The Van Allen family crest has a lion rampant igniting his flatulence with his fire breath.
But the absence of cards did not bother me in the least. Unless you’re a parent, grandparent, or greeting card adherent, you ain’t lingering down the “Shoebox Greetings” aisle looking for the exact old-person-breaking-wind cartoon image that rightly captures your sentiments. There are also the dead serious cards with hazy images of sunsets and poetic verses inside that are great if you’re celebrating your birthday inside a casket. Seriously, this should be a fun time. Get me drunk and laughing.
Oh, and to the person that invented the card that plays a song every time you open it: I hope you have to go on a cross-country road trip with Doug Ford criticizing everything you do.
Then the Facebook signals fired up. Throughout the day I could feel my phone getting heavier with Facebook notifications with well-wishes from people who friended me. That’s a relatively new thing. Also kind of new is that I was just able to type the word “friended” without spellcheck looking at me like I was an idiot. What a brave new world we live in. They kept coming and
I couldn’t help but feel touched that such a small effort performed by many can make a collective difference. It’s the “every penny helps” philosophy for happiness.
Thanks, folks. I’m truly touched.
Things have been great as I look back over the course of the year: full year married to a wonderful woman, seven years a podcaster, performer for #JFL42, and mature enough to know that you put the fact you are married at the top of that list.
It’s been a good year, and a challenging year and I look forward to the next 90, when I will be writing this by dictating into my new HeadPhone (Apple’s ingenious phone device embedded in your skull) while riding my HoverBike to my podcast studios to interview Don Harron as “Charlie Farquharson”.