Play To The Ladies
Hanging around the place, not much to do, and a couple of new bits in the hopper. I remembered that Andrew Evans was going to be hosting Ein-Stein’s so I figured I’d have a pop at it. If I could get on, cool. If not, no worries. I’d be able to watch the show, hang out with Andrew, have a pint or two, no big bother. Ease into the week. I’m booked there for the 3rd of April anyway, so it’s not much bother there.
Got there to find a couple of friends of mine on the show, namely Jeff Elliott (always good for a good show) and Scott McCrae (one of the harder room workers around). Got hold of Ruby who was hosting, since Andrew apparently had the 40-oz flu after seeing Lewis Black at Massey Hall. I was able to secure a spot. Aces! Hung out with Jeff and Scott and waited for one of my civilian friends to show up. He was going stir crazy at his place and just needed to go out. Why not an evening at Ein-Stein’s to make him regret the decision to leave the safe womb of the apartment? He arrives and wants the same thing I’m drinking, which is Ein-Stein’s house-lager-slash-grain-alcohol-straight-from-a-silo- somewhere. It’s also the cheapest pint of the night. So, I lean into the bartender and say “he’ll have a pint of the cheapest pint you’ve got”, which is the way it was described to me. Trust Nicole Arbour to pounce on that and add it to her set on how she was in a ranty mood for being dumped. “Ooh, the cheapest pint. Where do I sign up to be with you?” Ah, well. Glad I could help. Her set went well regardless.
I went up after Scott, about third on the show, and apparently tripped into the $30 competition they run every week. Hit the stage and levelled with the crowd that I didn’t think there could possibly be $30 worth of funny on the setlist. There was one table in the centre with everyone else occupying the back of the room. The table in the centre? Students from, somewhere…U of T I guess. Five women plowing into wings, nachos, etc. Having fun, I supposed. So I directed everything to them essentially and did their bidding. They wanted more jokes? More jokes they got. Someone from the back asked me to get off and I just stated that I was killing at the centre table so they could stuff it. Two more jokes and off. I thanked the ladies and made my leave with my civilian pal.
Maybe next time he’ll stick with ‘Malcolm in the Middle’ and be done with.